Ends Justify the Means...Do They?

Man, this is tough. I was asked to write about this topic a few weeks ago and I'm just getting around to it. Partially, it's been because I had easier topics and partially, because I'm not sure what to say.

"The ends justify the means". It's a very famous quote. It's also an endless struggle for most of us. Does it matter how we do something that will benefit us, or perhaps many, as long as we get the results desired...the results we want?

I can write a big, long post about the ends justifying the means when it comes to national or international politics, relationships, power, etc. I could cover subjects like right to life, capital punishment, welfare or some other social crises. I'm not going to do that.

There are enough issues relating to to this idea in our everyday lives. What this post will touch on is a bit of the struggle this idea causes when it comes to relationships, leadership, business, and our personal lives.

BEFORE I START: There's a big difference between making tough business decisions and treating other people poorly to help ourselves. I just wanted that to be said.

Do the ends justify the means? YES, they do...sometimes. Then again NO, they don't...sometimes.

Look at these examples and think about when the end might justify the means. Then read the examples again and think about when the end might not justify the means:

Is it OK:
~ to lie in order to make people feel better about themselves?
~ to lie in order to make other people like you better?
~ to lay one person off in order to keep everyone else employed?
~ to cut everybody's pay in order to not lay anyone off?
~ to manipulate a boss to do what you think he or she should be doing because that's the way you think the boss should act?
~ to manipulate a team member into believing an idea was his or hers in order to help them feel more engaged about the idea?

Where do the examples end? They don't. They go on forever.

Here's a little advice:

1. Remember the golden and/or platinum rules:

GOLD: treat others like YOU want to be treated

PLATINUM: treat others like THEY want to be treated (not how you think they should)

2. Applying integrity to situations based on #1.

Other than that, we need to weigh the options/outcomes in any decision, do a cost-benefit analysis, and ensure that whatever decisions we make are not being made for personal reasons or personal gain.

So, do the ends justify the means? I really don't have a clue. I could go either way, depending....

Your boss doesn't want bad news

Nobody does.

What can you do? Not tell him? That would be bad.

So what can you do? You make the news as easy to take as possible:

1. Tell them early: bad news isn't like fine wine...it doesn't get better with age.

2. Give them all the facts: going in with only some of the details almost makes it worse...keeping #1 in mind, gather as much info as you can and then let the boss know.

3. Give them a plan or options to fix the problem: just dumping a problem in the boss's lap isn't that helpful and won't be very appreciated.

Bad news is going to have to be shared eventually, but it doesn't have to be overly painful. Take a proactive approach, keep as positive a demeanor as possible, and be honest.

Bloom where you're planted

A long, long time ago...in a far away place...I was given some very sage advice. I was a young Army officer who wasn't getting the breaks like I had hoped or expected. I could give you a list, but I won't bore you with the details. Suffice it to say that I never got my first choice of anything...and that was frustrating when I'd see some folks around me who got theirs.

OK...the advice. I was sharing my above frustration with a very kind soul who I really didn't know and have only a vague memory of today. He was some Major or Colonel and he was listening. What I do remember was that he quietly heard what I had to say and then said something like, "Let me give you some advice. Life's too short and most of us never get all the breaks we're looking for. Bloom where you're planted. That's what you can do. That's what you can control."

Bloom where you're planted.

You may have heard this saying before. I hadn't ever heard it before this gentleman shared it with me. I guess, to me, it means we can't control everything. We can't always get everything we want. We can't always end up with the job or position that we would like or think we deserve. Decisions like these typically belong to someone else.

What we can do is be our VERY BEST with whatever job we have, in whatever place we are, working with whatever people are on our team. For some of us, it means quitting our whining and bellyaching and just doing what needs to be done.

This is what we can control and this is where we can excel.

"Life's not all Beer and Skittles"

Note: The "Skittles" from the quote was a game that was a precursor to bowling, not the candy by that name. In the 19th century, it was considered a great pastime to hang out at the tavern playing skittles and drinking beer. The quote is from Thomas Hughes' Tom Brown's Schooldays, 1857.

We've got it all figured out. We're going to do X, Y, and Z. Our plan is in place. We've got it all wrapped up and tied with a bow.

Then life throws us a curve (or probably several and sometimes at the same time). Maybe it's health issues. Perhaps it's employment problems. Is it relationship troubles? It could be that life just isn't turning out the way we had expected or dreamed.

So what is there to do about it?

I guess we have a few choices:

• We can grouse and complain. We can pitch fits because life's not fair, because it's not how it's supposed to be. Where do you think that will get us?
• We can work to fix the issues and problems and make life more like we had hoped.
• We can roll with the unforeseen events, making the best of the lives that we have.

Regardless of what we choose, we can't hope to completely control our lives. What we can hopefully do is be mature enough to adapt and keep a positive attitude as much as possible.

Let's face it. We're supposedly grown-ups and life's not all beer and skittles.

What are your strengths?

I was recently helping a woman work on interviewing skills so she could find a job.

When I asked her what her strengths were, she said "I don't have any, I guess." She didn't see what value she could bring to a company. As I started asking questions, we determined that she did have some strengths that would be of value to most employers.

What about you? Whether you have a job or not, do you understand what your strengths are? Do you know what value you can bring to a job or organization?

Even if you don't have much work experience in a particular field, you may have some core attributes that make you attractive to bosses. These attributes relate much more to who you are than what you know:

• Do you have a positive attitude, in general?
• Do you do what you say you will do?
• Are you dependable?
• Do you follow-up?
• Do you show up for work and arrive on time?
• Are you trustworthy?

These strengths may sound too basic to you. I can honestly tell you that bosses need these attributes more than any teachable skill.

Employers can teach skills...they can't teach attitude.

Take a look at yourself and think about what you have to offer.

Do You Support DOUBLE STANDARDS On Your Team?

Back in November, I wrote a post about Double Standards and the impact managers "doing as I say, not as I do" has on team morale (see post here).

I want to revisit the subject of Double Standards. It appears that some of the leaders who say that Double Standards have no place in their organization need to do a reality check.

I'd like to help with that. Therefore, I have a few questions for managers to help them determine if Double Standards (no matter how small they seem) might actually exist in their offices:

Do you have a policy or rule stating that:

1. Team members must park in less convenient parking spaces so customers have the best ones...but then you end up parking right up front because you're busy and you have to run out a lot and you're only there for a minute (or hour or day)?

2. Lunch is exactly one hour, but you habitually take longer even when the lunches aren't business related...because you work more than 40 hours a week and so the rule wasn't really meant for you?

3. No food and/or drink are allowed at the desks because it looks unprofessional to customers...but you actually have an office and a door so your office looks like a small convenience store? After all, the customers don't go in there.

4. Snacks and/or drinks are provided only for the customers so you make staff members bring their own snacks and drinks...but you're so busy that you didn't get to take lunch or you have to work late and so you deserve to get free snacks from the company.

5. Staff must greet or, at least, acknowledge customers within 3-5 seconds of them entering your establishment or the team members get in trouble...but you don't directly work with customers so you can go so far as ignore them. I mean, it's not really your job, is it?

And, the list goes on...

If you don't think your team members notice such small, little things, you are probably smoking something illegal.

You want to help morale in your office? Then make sure you follow your own rules. Nothing hurts team attitudes more than bosses who apply one set of rules for the team and then have a "special" set for themselves.

Do you have any other examples of rule breaking like above?

Evolve, Adapt, Persevere

I'm one of those CAN DO people, and you know many of us, who are people of action. When we see problems that need solutions, we're ready with the answers. When we see people who have issues, we try to fix the problems. That's what we do...we fix things.

We're used to having the resources necessary to do the jobs that we think need to get done. We're used to facing up to obstacles and blowing through them or slinging them out of the way.

That was, of course, when we still had resources...when we still had money and people. With the economy the way it is, organizations have had to take very hard looks at their budgets and their resources. They've cut back, but the missions have typically remained the same, haven't they?

There are some of us who have the mindset that "if I can't do it 100%, then it's not worth my investment and I can't be a part of it." Of course, like we said, the missions don't stop. I even know some people who, when the resources don't fit into their "criteria of acceptable", just throw their hands up in the air and give up. "I can't work like this!" they cry.

Some of us need to do a serious reality check.

Those of us who work with people like this need to be willing to stand up and preach Evolve, Adapt, Persevere!

Certainly, most of us would like our realities to go back and be like they were when the economy was good. We can't go back in time. We can't change the past. We can reasonably hope that things will get better eventually.

What we can do is put our heads down and work. What we can do is look at the mission with fresh eyes. Instead of saying "we can't do it", we can say "how can we get it done?" in the context of current reality.

What we can do is listen to the words that Teddy Roosevelt is quoted as saying, “Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.”

Don't be afraid to embrace it. Don't be afraid to say it. Don't be afraid to champion it.

As leaders, can we afford to do less?