What do you do when you make a mistake?

Maybe this seems like a weird question, but I really want to know. What do you do when you make a mistake?

1. Do you cover it up? Do you build elaborate stories and make up tales or lie to ensure no one knows you messed up? Do you blame someone else, especially if they will never know?
2. Do you wait to see what will happen? It's not that that you will lie or anything, but maybe no one will notice. Maybe everybody else has so much stuff going on that they just let the mistake go and keep on moving. If people do notice, you can admit the mistake then.
3. Do you act like someone else made that mistake? Do you act like you are as surprised or outraged as anybody else? "Who did that?" "How could that happen?" Then you just wait for things to blow over, admitting nothing, and then go on about your life.
4. Do you admit your mistake proactively, before it becomes known? You know you messed up and the mistake could have an adverse impact on your business and on other people. You stand up and say, "that was me, I did it".

I suspect that there are a few people who "live" in one of these worlds with regard to mistakes and will rarely deviate. I also suspect that the rest of us have moved in and out of more than one of these worlds at one time or another. While I bet most of us were taught to handle mistakes like #4, is that the smart thing to do? Is that one of those options when you can be right and dumb and the same time?

What do you think?

Do You Have A Mentor?

What do I mean by "mentor"? Well, the definition of a mentor is: a trusted friend, counselor, or teacher, usually a more experienced person. Back in July, I wrote a post called "No Leader Is Perfect" where I touched on the need for a mentor (you can read that post through this link). I'd like to expand on the whole idea of a mentor today.

I believe we all should have a mentor figure in our lives, someone who we can count on us to give good solid advice and be there when we need them. Here are a few questions and my thoughts regarding each:

1. What are the main duties of the mentor toward the person being mentored (let's call that person the "mentee")?

• TRUST (if this isn't present, the relationship should not exist)
• Honesty
• Empathy
• Strong, active listening
• Guidance
• Coaching

2. What are NOT duties of mentors?

• Fixing problems
• Inserting themselves in the mentee's chain of command
• Being a spy for the mentee's boss

3. Is it possible for two individuals to positively mentor each other? I think so, especially if each of the individual's strengths are a little different. In fact, there are some distinct advantages to two people mentoring each other in that they can build a strong bond of trust and really understand how each other ticks.

4. Should a boss be a mentor? No, no, no. Was I clear enough? NO. I know there are people who would disagree with me here and I've had bosses who thought they should be my mentor. It's just that bosses are supposed to help fix problems whereas mentors should help their mentees see how to fix problems themselves. Plus, there may be times when the mentee needs advice on a conflict or issue with the boss. That can't really happen when the boss is the mentor. Additionally, when you have a great boss and a great mentor, then you have two really good sources of guidance instead of the one.

5. Should a subordinate ever mentor a boss? What? Are you kidding me? This is a real question, though. Team members can definitely give their bosses their opinions and their advice, but it is totally inappropriate and unprofessional for team members to mentor their bosses.

6. Can I have more than one mentor? I believe individuals can have several advisers especially if the individuals are managers or leaders, because they probably have varying responsibilities that different experienced people could help with. Mentors are different than advisers, though. Mentors build deeper relationships with their mentees. There's an element of openness, trust, and honesty that mentors should garner and that advisers probably cannot. So I think, that individuals should limit the number of mentors they have to one or two, as a rule of thumb. There's no problem at all with mentors having more than one person who they mentor, though.

7. Should the mentor be older than the mentee? The mentor should be more experienced and, in most cases, that makes the mentor an older person, but not necessarily.

What other questions are there regarding the mentor relationship? Is there anything to add? Do you have a mentor? Do you think having a mentor is valuable?

Aspiring to Greatness

I just finished watching an interview with Captain Chesley Sullenberger where they talked about the "Miracle on the Hudson" as well as what his life has been like over the last 9 months, since the accident. Yesterday, when digging through papers looking for my DD-214 discharge form from the Army, I came across several photos from around 20 years ago. I posted these photos on my Facebook page and have probably looked at them a couple dozen times since then. They bring back such a flood of memories, both good and bad. That part of my life was so long ago.

As I'm counting the days to my 50th birthday, things like the photos and the interview cause me to think about what I have and have not done in my life. They cause me to think about success and greatness and then I try to take my measure. It's really not the most fun exercise I've undertaken recently. I see so many people who have accomplished so many great things in their lives (at least, great by my standards) and it kind of gets to me.

Then I remember a very smart boss I once had, Dr. Cynthia Wike, who used to tell her people, when they were having a bad day, "OK, you've got 15 minutes to whine and feel sorry for yourself. Then you're done and you need to get back to work."

Thinking about Dr. Wike's words, I know we have to remember the past and pay it our respects, but then move on with life. I think the point should be to aspire to greatness, not in the sense of fame or fortune, but as human beings. How many lives have we touched, how many people have we helped, how much service have we provided to God and to our fellow humans? We also have to remember that when we fail (and we will, repeatedly), we do not give up like a bunch of losers. We can have our whine time and then get back to it because we are not quitters and the causes to which we aspire never stop, never wane.

Well, my 15 minutes are up. I need to get back to work now.

"...3 fingers pointing back at you"

I heard this phrase the first time when I was a young lieutenant (I mean, majorly wet behind the ears). I was a Signal Corps officer assigned to a Field Artillery battalion in the 4th Infantry Division. I was responsible for all the communications assets and was one of a handful of non-artillery types in the battalion's group of officers. I had gone to speak to my battalion commander about how the other officers and their men were not taking care of the communications equipment and how they wouldn't follow the manuals regarding communications training.

The colonel looked at me and said, "OK, Lieutenant Hall, I'll get on the other officers about this. However, remember, when you're pointing your finger at someone else, you have three more pointing back at you." I didn't get it. First, I'd never heard that phrase before and second, THEY were at fault, not me. At least that was obvious to me.

What I came to find out later was that my men had not properly trained the "gun bunnies" on how to use the equipment and I hadn't done as good a job working with my fellow officers as I could have. It was very uncomfortable to deal with when those officers got chewed out and then they proceeded to let the colonel and others know how the Signal guys had dropped the ball.

I point all this out to say that whenever we're not happy with what other people have done or failed to do, whether they're family, friends, coworkers, or people who report to us, we will be sorely mistaken if we don't take a serious look at our potential role in the problem. What did we do that helped cause the problem? What could we have done to ensure the problem didn't get this far or never existed at all?

Bosses take heed. When you're not happy with your people's performance, ask yourself what role you had to play. Ensure you've done your part and more before you start pointing fingers.

What Keeps You Awake At Night?

Someone once asked me what keeps me awake at night. You know, what is it that worries me more than anything else.

I reflected on that and realized I worry most about being fair to other people (my wife told me that's also what keeps her awake more than any anything else). I wonder why that is. The world isn't fair by any means. People mistreat each other constantly. People are unfair to each other regularly.

There are people dying in this world constantly, from starvation, from violence, and from disasters. We have two children who are going off on their own to build their lives. We have parents who are getting older and some relatives and friends who are sick, yet we worry most about being fair to those we deal with?

Could it be because the trust thing is so personal? I'm not sure that's it because what's more personal than your children, family, and friends? Being treated fairly by Bob Hall has got to rank at the bottom of the spectrum when compared to what some people are experiencing.

Could it be because my word and my personal values are so important to me (I can't speak for my wife here)? I definitely would rather have someone's respect more than friendship (did I really say that?).

Could it be that I believe how I treat others is something I can control when so many other things in my life are out of my control? I think that could be it. I'll think about it some more.

What keeps you awake at night?

If it's not illegal or immoral...

That's always been one of my mottoes. When I've been asked to do something I didn't like or I felt was distasteful, I would often say, "OK, I'm not really crazy about this task, but if it's not illegal or immoral, well, you're paying me so I'm bound to do what you want."

I think I used this line for the first time when my boss asked me if I would return a dress to the store for her. I didn't really want to do it, but it did get me out of the office...and I worked for her.

Some people get so worked up about being asked to do things they don't want to do at work. What do our wants or likes have to do with anything at all?

So, what if what we're told to do is S T U P I D, I mean bone-head stupid? What do we do then? For me, I would most likely tell my boss that I didn't recommend performing whatever task he or she had for me and then I proceed to explain why. If, after my boss listened to me, I was told to carry out the assignment anyway, I would do my best to make it my own...regardless.

What about you? What do you do when you're given a task that you don't want to complete, especially if it's stupid?

Saturn...out of touch and going out of business

Did you ever see the ads? I would laugh every time I saw them. A man in a bright green shirt said "Saturn builds cars that people want to buy" as argument against the idea being professed that America couldn't build cars that people wanted to buy.

Are you kidding me? I was supposed to believe that Saturn built cars that I would want to buy just because some employee said so? There was nothing compelling in that ad; nothing touched on what I would get out of such a purchase. Instead, the ad seemed to be saying that if I was smart, I would know that Saturn was the brand to buy.

I'm not saying anything good or bad about Saturn or the cars they make. I know plenty of people who've been very happy with their Saturn vehicles. My point is that, in order to stay profitable and moving forward in business, we have to stay in touch with our customers. We have to understand what they want. Consumers buy based on their perceived value (their WIIFM -- see my post on WIIFM here). If they feel what they are purchasing is of value to them, then they're happy to move forward.

Inside any organization that has customers, it's our job to help the customers imagine the value they will receive when they purchase what we're selling. We have to help make their imaginations come to life (like "if I buy that car, I will never have to worry about breaking down again" or "if I buy that car, there will never be another person as cool as me...everybody will want to be like me"). Many experts will tell you that most purchases, especially large ones, are made based on emotion (the heart decides and the brain rationalizes) and we have to tap into that. If we're not providing the value that our customers want, we need to realign our value proposition to meet the wants and/or help the customers realize (imagine) why they need our products or services.

I'm sure there are a lot of very smart people at General Motors. They know all the right business ideas and probably know way more than I will ever know about marketing. It's just that this knowledge doesn't seem to have translated into reality.

What am I missing here?