Employees Leave Their Bosses

I was just re-reading Monday Morning Leadership in preparation for a meeting. One of the comments in there was about why employees leave a company. That caused me to do a little Google search where I found this post called "The Real Reason Why Employees Leave" on the IAAP (International Association of Administrative Professionals) web site.

The article references a study by the Saratoga Institute that says:

"89% of managers believe employees leave for more money. But, in fact, the survey found that 88% of employees leave for reasons other than money."

You know the #1 reason people leave a company? It's because of us, their bosses. People don't leave companies, they leave US.

Sure, there are a percentage of "job hoppers" out there who are never satisfied or who are looking for 25 cents more per hour. Most employees, though, want to be where they are valued and appreciated. They also want to respect who they work for. Come on, who wants to work for a boss who they have no respect for?

That's our job as bosses: to value our people and ensure they feel valued; to set clear standards and expectations that all can follow, including us.

What are some of the ways we can help our folks feel valued and appreciated?

1. Communication: We regularly converse with our people. We don't just talk TO them, but we converse WITH them, keeping them informed soliciting feedback.
2. Respect: If we want our team members to show us respect, we have to do the same for them. The rules that apply to them should apply to us, as well.
3. Interest: We need to be interested in our folks and understand what's important to them. We need to learn their priorities and their goals. We need to understand what makes them tick.
4. Management: One management technique DOES NOT fit all. We need to tailor our approach, at least somewhat, to the people we're supervising. That doesn't mean we're wishy-washy or vague, but it does mean that we understand the subtleties and individuality of each employee.

What other ways can we help ensure our people know they are valued? What other ways can we help them exhibit the respect they want to give and we want to get?

3 "People" in the conversation

Yesterday, I was providing some coaching advice specific to how to best communicate with a team member who is not doing what the boss wants. I was explaining that it's very important for the person being coached not to think he or she is being attacked.

The key is to look at such a coaching situation like there are 3 people in the conversation:

• Boss
• Team member
• Action (offense)

During the session, the boss must ensure he or she addresses the "offense" separate from the "offender". Therefore, Suzie is not bad. Instead, what Suzie did or failed to do was bad. When the boss and team member are able to focus on the offense, hopefully, the team member will be able to interact more objectively and progress can be made.

For more information on both situational and ongoing coaching, follow this link to my 5-part series.

Encourage Constructive Feedback

We all want to be great leaders and managers don't we? Hopefully, our bosses provide good feedback to us. Still, we can definitely learn from other people than just our bosses. There are several other key people in your work lives who can help you grow by providing their feedback: Peers, Mentors, and Team Members (people who report to you).

It's one thing to ask for feedback and it's another thing all together to mean it. How can you prove to your colleagues and your team members that you really do want and appreciate what they have to say?

1. Ask for the feedback (duh, I know, but they can't read your mind even though you may think they should).
2. Thank them for the feedback.
3. Act on it (if it makes good sense). If the feedback is correct, let them know they were right. Even if you decide not to act on it, let them know you considered the advice...that you were listening.
4. Acknowledge the change, but without making too big a deal of it. You don't want to go around bragging on what an enlightened and mature person you were for taking someone else's advice ("Oh look how great I am. I can even take feedback from the little people." No.).
5. If you don't like what you hear, don't take it out on the messenger. You asked for it.

We can't become great managers and leaders without dedicated people around us. The feedback and advice they will hopefully share can be invaluable for us, both personally and professionally.

Do you know of other ways to encourage feedback from peers and team members? Do they need to be communicated or just shown by our actions?

The Opposite of Micromanagement...Laid-back Management?

What's the opposite of micromanagement? Could it be laid-back management?

If so, is that bad? Is it bad to have a laid-back management style? Well, micromanagement is definitely not good if that's a predominant trait. I think we can all probably agree on that. The same can be said for laid-back management, can't it?

Here's a possible example: one of your people comes to you for guidance on an issue and you say, "well, just do whatever you think is best" or "I'm fine with whatever." Like, micromanagement, it's not good to have that style as a predominant one, either.

Our people want to be led. They're not looking for someone to tell them how to do everything and they're also not looking for a boss who just leaves them to their own devices. They're looking for good, solid leadership that provides the right amount of guidance. Now, that amount is different for every employee and that's why it's important for bosses to ensure that, while they treat everyone fairly, one management style "doesn't fit all". Bosses need to understand each of their direct reports and relate to them in a way that helps each person flourish. It's a tall order, but it can be done.

"Well, what do you think you should do?"

When Dana, one of your team members, comes to you asking your help in solving a problem, you have several options, don't you?

You can:

1. tell Dana that he's on his own and he'd better come up with a good solution. After all, that's what you pay him for.

2. go ahead and tell Dana what should be done.

3. help Dana figure it out --

I like to say "well, what do you think you should do?"

Dana responds, "huh?"

I come back with "I know what I would do, but I'd like to know what you think you should do. Your idea might provide the best solution."

Dana says, "I don't know what to do. That's why I came to you."

Back to me, "OK, but you probably know more about this than you think. You probably have an idea about the problem. Let me ask it this way, 'if this were your company, what would you do'?"

#3 is my preferred approach (because you're so smart, you probably already knew that). Not only does it get Dana and the others thinking about solutions, he might have a better answer than mine like I mentioned above. After all, I don't have the corner on smarts, you know? If Dana doesn't provide the greatest possible solution, that's OK. At least he thought about it and I definitely want to encourage that behavior. Then I can gently help provide a possible answer or brainstorm with Dana to ensure he's involved in the solution.

Try responding this way the next time the opportunity arises. You can help empower your folks, help them start thinking more on their feet, and perhaps come up with a really great solution to the problem.

Could They Perform if Their Lives Depended on it?

I was recently reading an article in the Great Leadership blog: "Managing 'Bad Apples' is Key to Productivity" and enjoying the comments as well as the article. It reminded me of what I had discussed as part of my series on coaching back in June: Everyday Coaching, Part I:, Definition, Purpose, and Application.

In this first part of the series, I reflected on the thoughts of Drs. Lois Frankel and Karen Otazo who wrote:

"Could this employee do the job if his or her life depended on it?"

If the answer is "no", then you need to train your employee.

If the answer is "yes", then someone has an attitude problem and coaching might be a great way to help fix that problem.

When we start thinking about employees and how they're performing (and maybe whether any of them are "bad apples"), we need to understand our role in their performance and ensure we're setting them up for success.

If there's an issue, we need to ask ourselves the question above and either train or coach to resolve the issue. We also MUST ensure our employee knows what is expected of him or her. How can he or she perform, if the expectations aren't clear?

I'm sure there are "bad apples" out in the business world, but we need to ensure we've done everything possible to help our employee succeed before we stick him or her with that label.

World-Class Feedback

You know, I've spent a fair amount of time writing about providing world-class customer service so now I think it's time to spent a minute on what we should do when we receive it.

OK, really, I'm just going to talk about one great way to reward someone for outstanding service.

I'm someone who has no problem giving constructive feedback -- both positive and the other kind, too. In reality, I rarely provide direct negative feedback to people who don't work for me...unless they ask for it. If they do ask, well, I try to tactfully and unemotionally let them know how I feel and what I think they could do to remedy the situation. Otherwise, if it's someone who is expecting a tip, I'll let my displeasure show in the amount.

HOWEVER, for those few people who just knock my socks off with world-class service, I try to make sure the appropriate people are aware how happy and impressed I am. When I share my feedback about the outstanding service I receive, I attempt to do two things.

1. First, I let my server know. in a restaurant setting, for an example, I personally thank him or her know how much we appreciated the care we received. I also write a note on the restaurant copy of the receipt saying words like "you made my day" or "your great service made our food taste even better" (I got the receipt idea from something I heard Zig Ziglar say).

2. The other thing I try to do is let the manager know. One time, I told someone how great a job she did and she said, "thank you very much, but if you really like the service I provided, please tell my boss." She was right. So whenever I can find a boss or manager or supervisor, I ensure he or she knows about the great service I got and who provided it. It's actually a lot of fun because most managers are used to getting complaints, not compliments. So you say, "are you the manager?" and you can literall sense them tensing up. Then you let them know, "our server was Tom (and they're just waiting for the bomb to drop) and he was really outstanding. Our experience couldn't have been better." Then you see them relax and smile and hopefully you've made their day, too.

We human beings, especially Americans, I think, are so conditioned to complain that we sometimes don't know how to say "thank you" for outstanding service.

When you experience that world-class service, don't waste your chance to foster that great work. Say something.

Apathy -- Do we really want customers?

I recently saw this poster and had to have it so I bought a framed one off eBay the other day. In case you can't read the words in white at the bottom of the poster, it reads,

"If we don't take care of the customer, maybe they'll stop bugging us."

This is both very funny and very sad at the same time. It's very funny because it's so true and it's very sad for the same reason. Now, I don't know any business owners who feel this way about customers, but I have run into many people working for businesses who feel this way -- most of them not ALL the time -- but many of them periodically.

I've heard managers and other leaders say that they're really glad it's "quiet" today so they can get some work done or that they are so busy with customers that they can't get their own tasks taken care of. It's easy to think like this and I have to admit that I've felt that way more than once in my life.

I do think the title of "Apathy" doesn't apply to most people, but the poster does make a point. If we don't take care of our customers, they won't be back. Historically, this hasn't been the case in the medical industry where so many doctors and their staff have felt like the patients needed them more than they needed the patients...and it was often true. However, with healthcare reform being such a hot topic, many medical practices are taking a much harder look at their customer service practices and working to shape up.

What if you determine your office has more than it's fair share of apathetic reactions to customers ("more than fair share" = ANY)? What do you do about it? It's very possible that it's ingrained in the fabric of your office. It's very possible that it's been such a long pattern of behavior that it just seems that this is the way it is.

CULTURE SHIFT time. And it very well may be a tough shift. By having a shift in culture, I mean that the office or organization, as a whole, takes a look at the business and decides to change, at the core, the way things are done. For culture shifts to be successful, they must start at the very top of the team or organization. It's often easier to successfully shift a culture when there's a major change like new leadership. Then the new leader can set expectations at the beginning of how things will run.

Let's say that you've determined that the focus of your group is way too centered on the team than on the customer, meaning policies, procedures, hours, interactions, etc, are designed more for the pleasure of your team. You want to make a change, but you've been around a while so you may be part of the problem. Some people will tell you that "this is the way we've always done it" or "this is what you led us to do". These statements may be true, but when you see a mistake, do you continue making that mistake just because you've always been doing it...even if it was your idea?

So, is it impossible to change the culture to a more customer-centric one? NO. But, as the leader, it's going to take a large commitment of effort to ensure the change takes place. Where do you start?

1. Identify the problem and communicate it to everyone on the team directly.
2. Set expectations for yourself, your other leaders, and your team members.
3. Train all parties as necessary. I find that a lot of times, people know the right things to do, but they're out of practice or just haven't been doing those right things.
4. Observe staff interacting with customers
5. Coach to the behavior you want.
6. Correct, as appropriate and REWARD the same way.
7. Don't be afraid to say "good-bye" to those team members who can't or won't learn the new focus on customers (institute the "Good to Great" approach that Jim Collins laid out and decide who should be "on the bus" and in what seats).

Let's face it. You're in business to make money and you make money...long-term...by taking care of your customers and providing them the value they're looking for.

Start your week off right -- Encourage someone around you

Here's a great idea for first thing Monday morning.

Take 5 minutes before your day "officially" starts and write a personal note to someone in your office whether it be a colleague or team member (you could even write one to your boss if it didn't appear like you were kissing up too much).

The point is that everyone likes to know others think positively about them. You don't have to write something really profound or special to someone other than to tell him or her that you're glad you're on the same team.

One idea I heard about was a manager who bought a 1 or 2 dollar box of plain note cards with a generic design on the outside. Then, this person made a list of all the people he worked with. He tore the paper into strips with a different name on each strip and put them into a cup. Each morning over a few week period he pulled a different name out of the cup and wrote a personal note. He got to work before most others in the morning so he slipped the note onto the recipient's desk so they would realize the note some time during the day.

I understand that while some recipients liked the notes, they discarded them soon. Others held onto the cards to remind them of positive thoughts from someone else. Regardless, all of them appreciated receiving the notes.

Sharing encouragement and appreciation can be expressed in many differnt forms. This particular one is easy and inexpensive, but can potentially have a significant impact.

You have the power to positively impact someone else. Don't waste the opportunity.

Correcting Your People, "Carpet Bombing"-Style

Yesterday, I wrote about leaders who lavishing their praise on the whole team regardless of whether all the team members deserved it. Today, it's the flip side -- carpetbombing, or a broad, general attack on the whole team when, in reality, the leader's correction really only applies to one or a few of the team members...and he or she just tries to avoid the confrontation.

I would love to say I've never done this, but...I can't. In fact, I did this very thing in the past year. I made a correction to my whole team when only one person needed to hear it. Thankfully (although I didn't enjoy it at the time) another of my team members, "Ella" called me after the meeting where I had applied the "correction". She said, "Did I do ________? I don't remembering doing that." I then admitted that I had "carpet bombed" the team and that "Sue" really was the only person who needed to hear my correction. Then Ella rightly said, "Well, then why did I have to hear it? Why didn't you get with Sue directly?" Ella was soooo right. So, I sheepishly thanked her for bringing my error to my attention; then I called Sue and let her know more directly what needed to change.

If Ella had not had the strength and conviction to let me know she didn't appreciate my actions, I might have left most of my team either wondering if they had messed up or resenting me for calling them on something they didn't do (thankfully, I don't think the rest of my team did, this time, anyway) or both.

Save yourself a lot of the grief I caused myself and just deal with your errant team members directly. If you've been coaching regularly, the interaction really shouldn't be a confrontation or even a big deal for you or the "offender" and everybody on the team will be happier.

"He Who Praises Everybody, Praises Nobody"

If you're reading the blog on Thursday, 6/11/09, the "famous quote" for the day is reflected in the title of this blog.

Samuel Johnson, a famous British author from the 18th century, had it right. We, especially in America, I think, are so worried about everybody being happy and fulfilled while at the same time we, as bosses are afraid of confrontation, that we can often go down the path of praising everybody regardless...regardless of results, regardless of effort, regardless of attitude.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm a strong believer in improving the lives of the people around me, but every one of us has the responsibility to do the best job we can do...all the time. If we don't do our best, our bosses have the right, no -- RESPONSIBILITY, to let us know and help us get back on track.

Some of us seem to think, as leaders, that taking care of our people means making them feel wonderful all the time. I challenge all leaders to look at taking care of their people along the lines of...

~teaching them good habits, like how to be efficient and effective
~helping them learn new skills and activities that will help them grow in their jobs
~developing their thought processes and characteristics to move their careers forward and achieve greater successes

...all in the framework of strengthening the group or organization, which makes us all better, AND can help your team members feel empowered, get promoted, and make more money (and maybe you, too, for being such an awesome boss).

Praise thoughtfully and judiciously...it's really the fair way, isn't it?

Everyday Coaching, Part IV: Tips for Effective Coaching

Part of my 5-part series on coaching: Intro, Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV

This is the last of a four-part series on Coaching. In the last three sessions, posted over the last three days, I've covered:

Part I. Coaching -- Definition, Purpose and Application
Part II. Situational Coaching
Part III. Ongoing Coaching

Today, in Part IV, we'll cover coaching tips that haven't already been touched on previously:

1. Triangulate: When you're coaching for behavior modification with one of your team, think about there being three entities in the conversation: you, the team member and the activity or action being discussed. Then, it's not personal. And when discussing that third "entity", think about behaviors and not characteristics -- "separating the act from the actor" -- (e.g. "There appears to be an issue with tardiness here" instead of "You keep coming in late to work").

2. Let them know what's acceptable and what's not: Be very specific when you explain what activity is not working out and what you want to see instead. Help your person clearly picture "bad" and "good"; for example: outbursts at the customers = bad and a smile and bright attitude = good.

3. Do you have a role to play in the problem? Did your team member have a clear understanding of what was expected? Did you expect him or her to read your mind? What could you have done to ensure this problem never happened and surely doesn't happen in the future?

4. Feedback is a gift and if you're not providing it constructively, you're withholding the gift.

5. There's more than one way to skin a cat: Just because it's not necessarily the way you would have completed the task or duty, doesn't mean that it wasn't an acceptable way. If your people get the job done right, then that should be ok.

6. Success breeds success so don't dump all the changes you want made on the person all at once. Start off small or manageable and give your team member the chance to succeed. He or she should like it and feed off it for greater success in the future.

OK, so that's about it for me and my thoughts on coaching. Thanks again to Drs. Frankel and Otazo for their great insights.

REMEMBER: Coaching and Constructive Feedback can be impressive tools in a leader's arsenal and should be used regulary and consistently to help your entire team improve and flourish.


Good luck and Good Coaching.

Everyday Coaching, Part III: Ongoing Coaching

Part of my 5-part series on coaching: Intro, Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV

Today in Part III of this series on Coaching, we're going to cover ongoing coaching...meaning that leaders will be coaching regularly. If you read Part II of Everyday Coaching, you may remember when I said that coaching is a process.

Situational coaching opportunities come up regularly in any organization. Leaders have the opportunity to coach through an issue or let it go. As I mentioned in Part I, coaching, either situational or ongoing, is much less of an issue and much easier to do when coaching is, well...ongoing.

So let's cover what an ongoing coaching session might look like or include:

WHAT:

1. TALK ABOUT THEM...THE COACHING SESSION IS ABOUT THEM. The BIGGEST key for successful coaching is for the leader to have a relationship with each of his or her team members. Relationship? What do you mean by "relationship"? A personal relationship is very appropriate between any supervisor and team member. I'm not talking about being friends, but it is still a personal relationship. Reference my blog from May 28, "But I want my employees to like me" for more details, but, to be a strong leader you need to know your troops. You should know what's important to them:

~Family -- Do you know the name of your team member's spouse or do you know about the kids? Do you know about others important to your people? Do you know any details?

~What about dreams and aspirations? Do you know where your folks want to be moving forward or what they hope to get from their work or life?

As you get to know people better, and they know they can TRUST YOU (since you are obviously a trustworthy person -- don't worry, your actions will show your folks soon enough whether they can trust you or not), they are more likely to open up more and more. Then you might even find out things about their fears and apprehensions and might be in a position to help. If not, at the very least you can better understand how your people tick.

2. Other areas that could be included in a regular coaching session:
~Review task list
~Set priorities
~Discuss issues/problems that your team member might be having and/or you want to cover in more depth than you might in a situational coaching session.
~Development (as a leader, it is your responsibility to help develop all your folks)


WHEN/HOW OFTEN:

Like I mentioned earlier, coaching should be ongoing so it should be a regular event.
1. Put it on the calendar. I strongly recommend setting aside formal time for each of your team on your calendar so you can ensure the time is protected. There's nothing worse than missing coaching sessions on a regular basis because they get preempted or worse -- forgotten.

2. Schedule at times that can be protected. I know, I know, bosses are busy...often the most busy person in an office or organization. So what can be done to help ensure coaching happens? One suggestion that I really like is to have coaching during lunch. "Lunch? I don't even regularly get lunch." Ok, ok, hear me out. Let's say you have 4 direct reports. What if you took one day per week and had lunch with a different one of your people? You don't even have to go out to eat or spend any of your expense account (both of you can pack a lunch and "bag it"). If something came up during lunch time on a particular day, you could just switch your person to another day in the week. And, if for some reason you weren't available all week or a particular team member were out, you could double up on another week and it wouldn't be too overwhelming.

3. Meet monthly, at a minimum. Depending on how many direct reports you have, how busy you are, or how closely you work with a particular team member, you may want to schedule your coaching sessions as often as weekly. I personally like bi-weekly. The great thing about having scheduled coaching sessions more often than monthly is that things come up and if you have to cancel a monthly session (not postpone), it's a long time until the next one. Having meetings scheduled more frequently allows a lot more flexibility. You don't want to meet just to meet so if you're both all good with everything when a weekly coaching session is coming up, you can cancel that meeting without worrying -- you'll catch up during the next week.

WHERE:

1. In private. Coaching is typically a one-on-one type of deal and is no other team member's business.
2. Does is matter where? You could consider meeting at the office or even in your own office ("Is that a problem?" "Other people might see us talking") Nothing's wrong with meeting at the office since, as a very fair and involved leader, you coach each of your teams regularly...you're not picking on anybody. It may be more convenient, for sure. Meeting off-site presents its own challenges, like with distance, time, or potential cost (if you get food). Whether you meet in or out of the office, the point is to treat everyone the same and there shouldn't be any issue.
3. In any case, any place comfortable where you and your team member can be relaxed will be fine, although someplace where note-taking is easily achieved would be the best. I do recommend staying away from talking at a desk, especially your desk, since it could be considered less open and more like the conversation is a one-way "you're going to let them know how it is" conversation.

The more you coach, the easier it gets and the more comfortable you and your team can be with the improvement and support coaching can provide.

Tomorrow, Part IV, on Tips for Effective Coaching.

Everyday Coaching, Part II: Situational Coaching

Part of my 5-part series on coaching: Intro, Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV

Today, in Part II of our Coaching series, we’re going to cover coaching one of your team members who needs to modify their behavior or actions regarding a particular activity. The two essentials for behavior modification are:

1. Feedback
2. Goal setting

Let’s say that all the staff in your office know that world-class customer service is key for repeat business. You’ve taught all your folks that, worked through different scenarios and you are confident they all know how to make customers feel your office is the place they need to be. You’re feeling pretty good about it all.

Then, one day, you walk out of your office and see one of your team providing less than world-class service to Sue, one of your customers. Specifically, Bob was not friendly when she came in and barely acknowledged Sue’s presence.

OK, OK, you’re starting to get a little steamed…no, very steamed because you’ve worked so hard to make every customer feel welcome and a part of your family. But, either:

1. You’re a non-confrontational person who doesn’t like to make people mad (including your staff) so you're going to suppress your anger, fix the problem with your customer, and hope the problem goes away.

OR

2. You want to flame Bob, because the customer’s always right and you won’t stand for this.

Neither of these choices is great. Doing nothing is not an option and if you kill one of your team, you get the chair.

First things first…you get the facts from Sue (at least her perception). Great, you know how she’s feeling and you’ve made it all better with her and now you need to ensure Bob gets the feedback he sorely deserves.

The thing is, Bob’s a great guy. He works hard and tries his best, but he’s somewhat moody. If he’s not paying attention, he can give customers the wrong impression. So what do you do?

1. Talk to Bob, and soon, so you can identify the issue (the sooner the better after an “incident” because Bob will likely remember the events better).
2. Let him know your perception of the incident and issue (“Bob, I observed what appearded to be a kind of “Eeyore” mood earlier today”); then get Bob’s perception (he has one…maybe he didn't know there was a problem or maybe has a reason, like his kid is sick or there are money issues or there's something else that is affecting Bob’s mood). The best way to get the facts is to see all sides.
3. Provide your coaching suggestions based on the training that you and the staff have all done (“Bob, we all need to have situational awareness…how we’re feeling and how we need to treat our customers, regardless of how our day is going.”). Provide encouragement that you know Bob can overcome the issue.

Are you all done? Well, you could just pray and hope for the best. However, coaching is a process and you can’t usually fix an issue with just one interaction. So...

Next steps:
1. You need to observe Bob (and you’ve let him know this during your initial session…that you’ll be observing)
2. Give him feedback – immediately – when he exhibits the performance you coached him on or when he misses the mark (“Bob, that customer was putty in your hands…Way to go!” OR “Bob, there still seems to be an issue with being moody. Tell me about what just happened”).
3. Get back together and discuss. Provide your perception about how Bob’s doing and let him share how he thinks things are going, too.
4. Repeat steps 1-3, above, as necessary, until you're satisfied everything's under control.

Tomorrow, Part III: Ongoing Coaching.

Everyday Coaching, Part I: Definition, Purpose, and Application

Part of my 5-part series on coaching: Intro, Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV

As we discuss coaching, we need to frame up the topic because it can be pretty broad. There are lots of different types of coaching -- sports coaching, personal coaching, life coaching, performance coaching, etc. In the case of this series on coaching, we're talking about leaders coaching their people at work.

So in that regard, what is coaching? Coaching is a training method used to help an individual or individuals reach a goal. First, the goal has to be set and then the individual(s) being coached need to understand what the goal is.

What results do you want from coaching your work team? We can talk about improved work performance and stuff like that, but what it really boils down to is getting your people to reach the goals you set (hopefully, that you and your team set together) and to reach them consistently. That means that your team does the right things whether you're present or not and they perform them in a positive manner.

Well, is coaching always the answer to get your people to perform the way you want? Drs. Frankel and Otazo pose a wonderful question in this regard:

"Could this employee do the job if his or her life depended on it?"

If the answer is "no", then you need to train your employee.

If the answer is "yes", then someone has an attitude problem and coaching might be a great way to help fix that problem.

So how do you know which it is? Well, duh, you talk to your people. You can find out what's going on with your people and it doesn't have to be awkward. More on that in Part III.

Look for Part II, Situational Coaching, coming up soon.

Everyday Coaching -- Intro

Part of my 5-part series on coaching: Intro, Part I, Part II, Part III, Part IV

Today, I'm launching a 4-part series on coaching. I love to coach. It's my favorite part of my work. I like nothing better than teaching others and sharing insights and then watching people succeed and flourish.

Unfortunately, I understand that many leaders don't actively coach. I know, I know. It's hard to believe, but it appears to be the case. Many leaders say they simply don't have time and time is an issue. However, I can't help but believe that a lot of leaders don't coach because they really don't know how. Let's see if we can help make coaches feel a little more comfortable.

The posts will cover the following outline:

Part I. Coaching -- Definition, Purpose and Application
Part II. Situational Coaching
Part III. Ongoing Coaching
Part IV. Tips for Effective Coaching

This will be a really good series, but I'm not smart enough to have thought of all the stuff I will cover all on my own. I do have a lot of coaching experience and I've read a lot of coaching material. The best down and dirty overview of coaching I've ever read comes from an article written by Lois Frankel, Ph.D. and Karen Otazo, Ph.D, "Employee Coaching: The Way to Gain Commitment, Not Just Compliance" that was published in "Employee Relations Today, Summer 1992 edition". Those are some smart folks and I will draw heavily from their article, but paraphrase in my own words. I just want to ensure these fine doctors get the credit they deserve.

OK, on to Part I.

Encouraging Outstanding Service

Many times in America, we receive service from another person. The service industry is one of the fastest growing (and maybe fastest growing) industries in the country.

Despite that, or maybe because of it, we often receive mediocre or poor service at a store, restaurant, or business. We're almost conditioned to it because it happens so much.

BUT THEN, all of a sudden, we are the recipients of TOTALLY AWESOME, OUSTANDING service. What do we do with that? Maybe we just hopefully enjoy it to the max since we know it's going to be a while, maybe a long while, until we experience such a thing again.

Or maybe, we provide some encouragement and positive feedback to the person who made our day and to hopefully spur them to provide it again for us or someone else.

There are different ways to provide that encouragement and feedback:

1. We can personally thank the service provider even more than with a "thanks" ("You sure did go above and beyond today and I really appreciate it" or "You know what? You made my day!").

2. We can write a note on the merchant copy of the receipt ("Outstanding service!" or "Because of you we had the best dining experience in a very long time. Thank you!").

3. Tell the boss. One time I gave someone a very strong "thanks" for a service they provided and the person responded, "Thanks, but if you really want to say thanks, tell my boss." GREAT point. If you have the time and can find the manager or supervisor, let him or her know and be specific with the name of the server and what happened. You'll probably knock their socks off...I did this a few months ago and the manager was so used to getting complaints that he began a "pre-emptive" defensiveness. He was shocked when I provided positive comments.

4. Do all of the above

*Just a note that if a tip or gratuity is warranted, the verbal or written thanks should not replace that cash. And if you have the money to be generous, I encourage you to share it...with the economy the way it is, servers are getting poorer and poorer tips.

When you provide this positive experience for your service provider, you may also have the chance to model your behavior for someone else like a spouse, friend, child or grandchild. What a wonderful example you can be for someone else while simultaneously doing something nice.

Think about it...and then do it.